Create a Schedule

Individuals who struggle with executive functioning skills often fail to create a well-organized schedule. They might jump from one task to another with little or no planning. To address this challenge, you can map out steps for your child for each part of his or her day when at home. For example, your child might have five steps to complete in the morning before leaving for school: wake up; get dressed; have breakfast; brush teeth; and check backpack to make sure it has all necessary items for the day. You may want a checklist for the backpack, too.

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Children with autism learn, behave, socialize, and communicate in ways that are different than their peers of the same age. The spectrum of autism is wide; some kids can speak clearly, while others are completely nonverbal. Certain children need intensive help with daily living skills, while others are more independent.  It is important that children with autism receive specialized services to help strengthen their areas of weakness. However, when services are scarce, or when your child is also receiving them at school, you can further support skills development at home with the ideas detailed below.

Create a Schedule

Individuals with autism thrive on routine. Changes in that routine and new, unexpected events can throw them off and lead to negative behaviors. Try sticking to a regular schedule at home for meals, wake up time, bed time, therapy, after school activities, and other daily activities. You should also create a visual schedule that your child can see. It should beia large chart indicating the time for each event, along with a description and corresponding picture. For instance, you might write 7:00 am wake up (with a picture of someone waking up), 7:30am breakfast (with a picture of someone eating breakfast), 8:00 am school (with a picture of a school), 3:30pm speech therapy (with a picture of a child receiving therapy), 6:00 pm dinner (with a picture of someone eating dinner), and so on. The more structured and consistent the schedule is, the better.

Use Rewards

Children with autism respond well to regular and consistent rewards. Every time you see your child doing a good job on a task (like completing a homework sheet or putting their dish in the sink), praise them and give them a reward such as a sticker or special prize. Try not to wait too long to offer the reward; the more frequent the rewards come, the better. Also, try to individualize the rewards based on your child’s interests. Some children like physical toys while others prefer watching a television show or playing a video game. Some kids are even fine with just a hug or a nice praise.

Try Play Therapy at Home

Many children with autism struggle to interact and play with other kids. Instead, they often play alone and repeat the same motions over and over again. While play therapy by a professional is likely the best option for developing play and social skills, you can also help your child build these skills at home. To do so, start by laying out a mix of toys in front of your child, like cars, trains, dolls, and animals, or even squeaky toys or bubble jars. Have them look at all the toys and decide which one they want to play with at that time. Later, you can try to engage with them using a more interactive game. You can also be more directed in your approach by presenting toys that offer specific learning opportunities. For instance, present your child with a baby doll to help them learn life skills like dressing and undressing the doll, bathing it, feeding it, and so on. You can also use kitchen toys (including a pretend kitchen) to build play, social, and life skills. Have your child say the names of different foods, make a meal, and then discuss the meal with you. You can ask pointed questions, like “What’s for dinner tonight?”, “What vegetable are we eating?”, and “Is there anything for dessert?” Playing with play doh can strengthen your child’s muscles, which can help with writing, and allow them to be creative in forming shapes while also improving their cutting skills.

Play Games!

Playing games is a great family activity that can also help your child with autism build important skills. For instance, to build sequencing and following directions skills, try playing Simon Says – where kids follow commands that engage gross motor movements. Commands might include “Simon says, hop on one leg” or “Simon says, touch your nose.” So as to build speaking and listening skills, you can play the game Conversation Cubes. This game includes thirty-six cubes; each with a conversation starter question on it, like “What do you like to do in cold weather?” and “What foods do you like?” Players can answer the questions orally to build oral language skills, or you can even use them as writing prompts to help your child get started with a writing piece.

Children with autism respond well to services from professionals during, and often outside of, school.
However, the additional support you provide at home can help them further develop their social, academic, and general life skills.

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Your Child and Autism
Many parents have that ‘a-ha’ moment when they realize their child may have a more profound challenge than previously expectant. Unlike your friend’s kid at the same age- your child has trouble maintaining friendships, struggles to communicate, or demonstrates repetitive body movements. Perhaps they have difficulty relating to the world around them and seems inflexible with their thoughts and behaviors. If you notice these characteristics, don’t ignore them. While your child could be delayed, it may be wise to seek a professional opinion and check if your child may be on the autism spectrum.

Learn the Milestones
Many children with autism show developmental delays early on and don’t meet typical milestones. For instance, by 6-9 months, most babies can sit up without support, babble sounds, and respond to their name. By 9-12 months, babies typically grab objects and toys, crawl, and stand independently. Most children can walk independently between ages 1-3, climb stairs, jump, stack objects, speak in short sentences, and follow basic directions. Between ages 3-5, children can typically toss a ball overhand, get dressed independently, and draw a full person with all features. Children ages 6-12 generally have developed strong friendships with peers and are usually independent in completing their school work. If you notice delays or regression in any of these milestones and your instincts tell you something is off, your child may be at risk for autism.

Identifying Autism
If you think your child has autism, take action. The sooner you identify and address autism, the better it will be for your family. Speak to your child’s doctor; he or she may inquire as to whether all developmental milestones have been met and may recommend an autism screening. This screening typically consists of a series of yes or no questions regarding symptoms. If your doctor suspects that your child may have autism, your child may need to have a full diagnostic evaluation by an ASD specialist. Typically, the evaluator will observe your child, ask you as the parent a series of questions, fill out questionnaires, and administer a series of tests to your child. These factors will allow the evaluator to identify whether or not your child may have autism so you can take appropriate action for a concrete diagnosis.

Your Child Receives an ASD Diagnosis — Next Step
First off, don’t panic. There are many resources and a great deal of support available for children with autism, and your child is certainly not alone! However, the earlier you intervene and seek your child’s services, the more gains you will see. Once you receive the diagnosis, which typically includes a full report, read it thoroughly and review the evaluator or doctor’s recommendations. Reach out to your child’s school to let them know about the diagnosis and inquire about creating an IEP (Individualized Education Program) to map out the services your child will receive based on their needs. These services may include special education classroom placement, speech therapy, occupational therapy, behavioral therapy, physical therapy, social skills groups, etc. Also, learn what you can do at home to help your child, such as creating a set structure and routine and rewarding good behavior. The more you can work as a team with your child’s doctors, educators, and therapists, this will help provide consistent support to your child.

Many children with autism are kind, loving, high-achieving individuals who have countless gifts. With the right support, your child can succeed academically and thrive in life.

Dr. Emily Levy is the founder of EBL Coaching, a tutoring program that specializes in one-on-one home and on-site instruction for students in grades preK-12 in NYC, NJ, and Westchester. She is also the author of Strategies for Study Success, a study skills workbooks series emphasizing test taking, note taking, reading comprehension, writing, and executive functioning strategies, and the Flags and Stars Orton Gillingham student workbook series. These books are currently used at schools nationwide. Dr. Levy studied at Brown University and later received her Masters Degree in Special Education and her Doctorate Degree in Education. She has spoken nationwide on research-based methods for teaching students with and without learning disabilities. Dr. Levy is currently the Director of EBL Coaching’s learning centers.

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